Jilted Generation X

Ramblings of a rolling stone...

2010-11-20T02:28:00.000-08:00

I am going to change, instead of waiting until the new year I shall make some resolutions to myself now... I need to get out of this chamber I have locked myself in, it is dark, harrowing and lonely. I am lonely. There I said it. I have admitted how I really feel, wasn't so hard was it. I find it is always easier to write down my thoughts then express them through speech. In speech there are too many ways where you can fuck up and miss-word things, in writing you have the time to think about what you want to say, word it perfectly and say what you want without interruption from others. This is why snail mail is my communication of choice, not because I think I am being eclectic embracing elements of the past and rejecting the future but simply because it is easier to write.

"I wish it was the sixties, I wish we could be happy, I wish, I wish that something would happen... my baby's got the bends, we don't have any real friends..."

Oh just how true you are Thom...

I have recently begun writing a story, this story shall be everything of my wildest thoughts. I believe that far too many books get published with the most drab, mundane content. I think chick-lits fall into this category, now most prominent throughout Irish writers. All these books have basically the same story, the characters are usually all just variants of the same thing, my book shall be so twisted that there will be hardly any reality present. This may be the key to getting out of this place, seeing the light and expressing some joy and hope in my writing. As you have problem guessed from reading my poems I am more of a pessimist, I would love to discard my Plath like qualities and mold more into a Wordsworth, seeing beauty in every single thing. I doubt that this can happen though, though I think my muse may have entered my life, if so my creativeness shall be like a flowing spring, constant, never ending and pure,

"Do you cry out in your sleep,

All my failings exposed, get a taste in mouth,

As desperation takes hold, Why is it something so good,

Just can't function no more?"

I have no idea Ian my dear, I wish you had some answers for me...

When you are falling for someone it is very hard isn't it? Especially when you know they don't feel the same. You want to shake yourself, get these feelings to dissolve like sugar in water... all the sweetness gone, becoming something neutral. I fall too easily all the time. I am falling all the time. Fall, fall, fall...

I have entered the Autumn of my life,

The colour became that of fire and everything began to decay,

Soon there will be no darkness or strife,

When Winter comes I shall have to go away...

Though I do not want to leave you,

My handsome, charming Dear,

There is simply nothing I can do,

Only clutch to the branches of fear...

I shall miss you,

That does not need to be said,

When the new year comes about that is my cue,

I shall miss our talks, our antics in bed...

Always know that you will be in my head,

Even when I am gone,

Stone cold dead,

Sorry for this life that I lead...

I embroiled you in it,

I'm sorry for that,

Grasping for things that I shall always lack,

Now run away and don't look back...

So I have now transitioned into a rolling stone, constantly moving, never stagnant, I wonder where this new journey shall take me? Into your arms or to far distant lands?

Musings of a modern poet... chapter seven

2010-11-19T15:35:00.000-08:00

Transition...

This will be my final post as a modern poet, for now anyway. I don't think the term 'modern' was appropriate really as I am far from modern. I devote my life to the past in my study and my thoughts, my heart belongs in the 1960's and my sense of how people should respect each other is held in the 1920's - where men were chivalrous, ladies were elegant and there was no such thing as a scumbag.

Tomorrow my blog posts will take on a new journey, that of self progression. This week has been my self discovery week, finding out who I am and what not. I don't think I have truly discovered yet but I still want to move on to the next stage. I am sick and tired of holding back, I wish I could just ask people the things I want to ask them, though the rejection would be harrowing I would have at least an idea of what direction things are going in. Part of me feels lost, I know what I want but achieving it is hard. I had this debate with someone tonight whether or not you can change the way people feel, I would be against this motion. I have tried countless times to change someones mind about me and the way things could be, they are simply not interested. I can never change this persons mind to favour me, therefore I think I am right about this particular debate, though who knows, that is a tragedy about humans, the uncertainty resounding from every note.

I could not think of my own poem today so I took a piece from my new book...

The Return

- Robert W. Service

They turned him loose; he bowed his head,

A felon, bent and grey.

His face was even as the Dead,

He had no word to say.

He sought the home of his old love,

To look on her once more;

And where her roses breathed above,

He cowered beside the door.

She sat there in the shining room;

Her hair was silver grey.

He stared and stared from out the gloom;

He turned to go away.

Her roses rustled overhead.

She saw, with sudden start.

"I knew you would come," she said,

And held him to her heart.

Her face was rapt and angel-sweet;

She touched his hair of grey;

But he, sob-shaken, at her feet,

Could only pray and pray.

Perhaps one day you will come find me, though I doubt it considering that if you don't want me in what is supposed to be my prime, why would you want me withered and grey haired, too old for adventures and exciting things. I'll always have that hope though, that you will come and I can be whole again. I am nothing without that missing piece, that one special person who understands you more then you understand yourself, a soul mate of sorts. There are some who could perhaps take over where you left but I don't think they would want to either. It's the loneliness that is crippling really... I miss you always being there.

Songs I have listened to lately -

"High and Dry" - Radiohead

"The Blowers Daughter" - Damien Rice

"It's Been Awhile" - Staind

"Fools Gold" - The Stone Roses

"Sabotage" - Cancer Bats

Now I am exhausted and I feel as though I have nothing more profound to say, I have a billion words and thoughts inside my head but I don't want to write them on a public sphere. I would love to have someone to share all my secrets and hidden desires, wherever you are, hurry up and get here, I miss you already.

Slán agus thank you for reading...

Musings of a modern poet... chapter six

2010-11-19T04:10:00.000-08:00

I didn't write a blog yesterday... perhaps I should write two today to make up for it, a morning edition and an evening edition. I shall write another before I go to sleep I think, that is always the time when my thoughts are wide awake wanting to be acknowledged.

Last night I realised what a true friend is and it is not what I witnessed last night. Now I am going to give the silent treatment, no contact, I just could not be arsed with people who are two-faced, it is the worst trait anyone could have. Coming to the realisation that the relationships I had were fake has spurred me further to want to go on an adventure.

I am thinking of just jetting off, working as I go, writing every thought, recording every memory. Living a dream everyday instead of living a life which wasn't created for me. I am part of a generation who are being choked by a recession, all hope is gone, a replica of the early 90's, a generation left behind or jilted so the blog says. Jilted Generation X indeed. What do we have to look forward to? Daytime television, dole ques, discount stores? Oh what a life we lead.

Recently I have found someone who brings out the best in me I feel. This friend of mine should know who they are and if they don't well then I obviously haven't told them enough. I have five very close friends from around the globe, all whom I treasure more then anything. What these friendships have taught me is that international borders are not restraints, people are never more then a plane journey away. If I could meet these special people then life would be complete, their friendship has shown me just how fake things were here, friendships are about learning, life and laughter, not who can get pissed the most and have the best stories the next day... Wow, I really am too old for my age! Says the girl nursing a hangover, wearing an old band hoodie and feeding the cat being the most productive thing done since she woke up. Oh dear, blame the recession...

I am on the cusp of an adventure, standing on the edge looking down from the clouds, wind, an accelerator, pushing me further into the depths of excitement and delight.

Your voice, so sweet, like a chorus of angels, whispering gems to me, nothing is wrong when your near, no crying unless they are tears of diamonds. Feed me the drippings of your soul, touch me, kiss me, make us whole.

You have become my silver lining, my own personal protector, now what would life be without you, lonely, un-poetic, nothing useful, creative, constructive to do.

Things to do in future -

Never drink alcohol again

Be more impulsive

Tell you how I really feel before it's too late

Slán agus thank you for reading...

Musings of a modern poet...chapter five

2010-11-17T05:34:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Tuesday, one of my working days. I finally finished a drawing which I had been working on for a couple of days, the sense of accomplishment was great! Then a proceeded to try once again to apply for teacher training in England. Why does it have to be so complicated? If I'm honest I don't really want to go to England, if I really had to leave Ireland I would rather go somewhere much warmer where I could lie on a beach all day and write novels whilst having multiple vodkas and oranges... see this is the idealist coming out in me! The realist, however, says 'get back to work and stop writing your blog whilst at college'... idealist wins in this situation.

The human imagination is a very impressive thing. Reading articles for college I have come across some great debates and theories on the whole world structure and if anything is real at all. According to Jacques Derrida - "Everything is a metal construction, a grey area". If this is true then why don't I live in a happy world where everyday is summer and it rains lollipops eh Jacques? But I can see why some people will think that. Coming back to an earlier statement in a blog where I wrote "Everything is lies", I have had it backed up by Michel Foucault a prominent post-modernist - "How can history have a truth when there is a history of truth? There is no such thing as truth, only regimes of truth". I guess I am a post-modernist then, don't say much, deconstruct other peoples work and find new meaning. Yes... a post-modernist with a Utopian imagination, yet at the same time a bit of a realist, seeing the world for what it really is. I guess my theory is one of taking things as you find them, my lens of the world is not rose tinted by any means and of course I feel too much empathy for certain situations. However, I am not a moron, I know most people have hidden agendas, self-interesting actors with only themselves in mind... Oh International Relations how you have improved my mind!

I feel a bit more optimistic about things in general today, though if I could just stop procrastinating that would be fantastic! It's all well and good knowing things but if you don't demonstrate what you know you will get no where in life, you shall simply be a by stander of society.

I woke up this morning, as a new beginning was dawning, all the mist and fog had been swept away, the dark clouds were gone, birds were in song and this was the rest of my day...

I danced out the door, could wait no more to view the transcendent colours that stood before me, I read some books, search crannies and nooks, the world was filled with the magic three.

I played some games, I searched for names from my Isle to places unknown, I laughed and smiled as I knew all the while that a new heart I had sewn.

The stars shone bright, the light of the night, twinkling like magic winks in the sky, no evil was found, no corruption, no sound, no single trace of a lie.

I enjoyed my time, in the meadows of my mind, my prairies so lush and in bloom, no fear I felt, no sadness for this Celt, no harrowing sense of doom.

The water was clear, the ice was diamonds, the sky was blue, the sun was golden, it was all so perfect, this Utopian paradise, too perfect to be true.

Then the alarm went off, as I woke up, my world was a beautiful dream dream... there no more that I could do. I had arrived back to the land of harsh reality, but all was not lost and I knew after dusk that to this Utopian dream, I would once more be given the key.

Yes feel my optimism flowing through every pore... until tomorrow anyway.

Things to do -

Enjoy this feeling

Learn something new

Meet someone new

Slán agus thank you for reading.

Musings of a modern poet...chapter four

2010-11-16T03:28:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, what a day. After constructing myself in a positive, creative way all day I ended up making a moron of myself before I went to sleep. Once again this proves to me that being honest with people is the worst thing you can ever do. People are much happier to listen to pretence and live in some Disney created scene all their lives. The real world isn't like that no matter how much we try and divert ourselves from it. All you have to do is look at the news every evening to see that there is no gospel or good news. There would be nothing to report if it was not bad, the media would have nothing to hype up, who wants to listen to good news? Apparently not the human race.

There appears to be a mentality that living fast and dying young is a way to be remembered and achieve icon status. All of my heroes are dead bar Corey Taylor and even at that he is turning into something which I don't really admire - pink shirts and a shaved head? Fair enough he is maturing but can I really be expected to believe that this is the same guy who screamed 'People = shit'? Oh please... But there is Kurt Cobain, Ian Curtis and Sid Vicious, all lived fast and died young. All of them also having an undiagnosed life of depression of course. I believe that everyone has a time to go and when it comes then it must be excepted. Of course it is sad and devastating but that's what life is about isn't it? The passionate, romantic image of turmoil, pain with a little sprinkle of sunshine. If you find your sunshine that is. Some people's sunshine is drugs, others drink, others music, my personal favourite is love and relationships, being with another person and sharing your life with them. However, you need someone to understand you for it to work out well and then there is the problem that people will run away before they tell you how they really feel about you. I hate that. I do it myself, I say something, the other person doesn't hear me and I say 'never mind' or 'it doesn't matter' but it DOES. I want to say it but rejection is terrible. I would rather eat my own eyes with a spoon.

Everything I saw was gold,
Your stories untold, your treasured hold, it all shimmered in the radiant sun. But now you are gone, the relationship ended, the loving done.
It has turned to rust, dirty brown rust, all hopes and dreams dissolved to dust, no beauty now in which I can trust. I was addicted to your sugary smile, your flaws and defects all placed in denial.
Fools gold, perhaps that's what it was, I imagined your Midas touch, always imagining, imagination being better with reality, though I savoured it too much.
Now the rust has infiltrated every spore, the way you felt, you feel no more, everything withered, disheveled and dead, though spring in still in bloom inside my head.
Then it hits me, I'm in Heaven, fifteen, ecstatic but dead.
So, there is another 'poem' written in the spur of the moment. I wish I could be more organised and go and sit down and write something correctly structured and everything but flaws are always nice I think, they make it more unique. Flaws seem to be the things in which people love in other people the most. Uniqueness, if everyone was perfect what would be the fun in that?
Things I learnt today - don't be honest with someone about how you really feel unless it is unavoidable. They will more then likely run away even though they say they are not, you will notice a distance shortly after your revelation.
Things I need to do -
Keep my thoughts to myself, hard when writing a blog but I shall try my best!
Look forward to Thursday
Get over tomorrow
Slán agus thank you for reading.
P.S. I have a secret for you.

Musings of a modern poet...chapter three

2010-11-15T01:39:00.000-08:00

So yesterday, Sunday, day of rest - not at all. To tell the truth being at work wasn't the worst part of my day it was the feelings that followed that were most relevant and painful.

From a young age I learnt that you can depend on no one but yourself, almost everyone is untrustworthy, consumed with jealousy and that they would rather see you fail then succeed. This is why I prefer to be alone, I can be my own critic and hate basher without someone else getting in on the game. Last night I was ready to pack my bags, drive to the airport and get a flight to anywhere in the world that I could afford. Feel so restricted in this country and this recession, it's like it is choking me. I studied for three years for a degree to not be able to get a job out of it? Great life. If the world really does end in 2012 I'll have achieved nothing.

When you have loved someone unconditionally for a time you expect them to never hurt you, you let down your barriers as you are lured into a false sense of security. I wish I hadn't done this. Oh what I would do for a time machine to go and reverse all that I have done within the last two years...

Everything is lies

Nothing is real, now a desected human being, nothing more to feel. Numb, I can't speak, realisation is hard, knowing that everything I worked for is gone.

Feelings, I can't see them, therefore I don't believe, Utopian dreams all dissolve away with the knowledge that everything is lies, when the loving is done you become someone I despise. Love, a word with no meaning.

Could you love the most evil person in the world? If they never told you who they were, if there were no stories told?

Words are deceiving and 'love' is a word. A mere word that I won't trust again. Love luring you in to a wild, unsafe eden.

Don't say three little words to wash the pain away, it's embedded in my heart and eternally it shall stay.

Say something better like - "I'm here if you need to talk". This would have perhaps stopped me, but away I did walk.

I was so down last night. I came to the decision to stop my idealist thoughts and keep things strictly as they should be. No more smiling about things that can't be achieved and living off teenage like dreams.

Goals for today -

Write some letters to send out in Decemeber

See if certain people are okay

Stop feeling so shit

Slán agus go neirí leat

Musings of a modern poet...chapter two

2010-11-14T04:22:00.000-08:00

So I keeping my promise to myself to write on this everyday. I always have so many ideas but not the energy or motivation to exhert them so I am definitely keeping to this one...

So yesterday, not a very eventful day really, woke up far too early having only gotten to sleep at 4 am the night/morning before hand, thanks to Skype and my company on it, so thank you for that. Skype seems to be an extraordinary thing to be able to converse with someone miles away, see and hear them even though you are a sea apart, very cool.

Yesterday I felt I had to do something to my room, it is far too cluttered, part of my creativity I guess but it was seriously bothering me, therefore I took out the black bags and set to work. I have an awful lot of stuff! Most of it paper due to going on four years of college and a year a solid snailing mailing all wonderous people from around the globe. I now have a different drawer for each category of letters, quite sad really but they are very special to me, little pieces of history littering my room. Also yesterday I had the time to listen to some music, somthing which I had seriously been neglecting. Funny how some songs remind you of people you don't even want to think about and memories you want to forget but you listen to them anyway...

Yesterday was very uneventful, if I was living everyday as if it was my last and that was my last then it would have been very disappointed. Too exhausted to do anything worthwhile and too much procrastinating to get anything spectacular done.

As for my poetry, I write them all on the spur of a moment, something I always do not being the most organised person in the world. I think my thoughts flow better that way ~

Hello again... your haunting me, even though you're not here, I haven't seen you for a long time, I'm missing you, My dear,

Notice the word 'My' here, you shall always be mine, I don't care who your with right now or the flowing passing of time,

I shall always have you here, haunting me, like a persist ghost, the only bit of you I will now ever see, in photographs and old school books, some teenage memory.

It's funny, how I hurt myself on purpose, just for you, not physically but mentally, so much easier to do.

My heart throbs and my veins feel like they are bursting, a rush of blood too much, the memories with you, ones to which I will always clutch.

Fifteen forever, two years too far, three years spent together... It never was quite perfect, but the defects made it better.

Not that you care now, you're much more happier than before. Time for me to do the hardest thing, cut off my feelings, close the door.

Not very happy with that one but part of being a poet I guess, never finding perfection in you work, it shall always remain incomplete.
Things I learnt yesterday - the most important people in your life don't have to be the ones you see everyday, when people are gone they are never coming back, people you've never met can have a profound effect on your life.

Things I decided yesterday that I need to do ~

Keep things in perspective

See my friends more

Stop the Utopian thoughts which enter my mind on various occassions, these things are unrealistic and shall never materialise.

That is all, slán agus go neirí leat.

Musings of a modern poet...

2010-11-13T01:54:00.000-08:00

Notice the use of the word 'girl' here and not 'woman', I don't think I will ever be comfortable with calling myself that, it would be too committed to the process of growing up I think! So I decided to mix this blog up a bit. It was quite an undefined thing with rants, opinions and promotions of various things so I decided why not combine the whole three!? This is be like a diary for me, hoping to fill it with interesting things for you to read about my life and my rants, likes and favourites. This is a poem which I wrote today, I hope to write one everyday. It's not very good but it means a lot to me. Hope you enjoy...

There comes a certain point at night when I want you too much
to say, A time when the worst thing imaginable is that you would have to go
away, If I concentrated on dreams and the meanings of things there would be far
too many reasons to stay, But I stay schtum and would rather hum my mundane
musings of my day...

When you depart, it breaks my heart that you left in such a way, why the
night couldn't be ours, dance 'til early hours on the mists of flirty cowers,
imposes upon me, the questions in my head they stay.

This is how I truly feel, everything dead, nothing too real. Nothing blooms without you, nothing holy that I can do. You presence is light in itself, spreading joy to every morsel, leaving you go, I shall remain on the shelf.

I imagine you now, with a golden crown, up on your pedestal you remain, too
priceless to touch, to pretty, too much, perfection in every vein.

I shall never have you back, you I shall always lack, my puzzle piece missing
and gone, when it was always known into my heart you did burn when we learnt
that our hands did make One.

It's too late to change, history the same, like a dark, torrid, unfair game.
I have lost, now you are gone, to the tune of a song and I shall never see you
again.

So yesterday I awoke at half eleven, this gets later and later each day. This recession is making me so so lazy it is unbelievable, I nearly cry having to go to work on a Sunday and college on a Wednesday! God help me when I ever secure a 'real' job and have to get up early all week. I commend you people who do it everyday, I don't know who's luckier or more pathetic, me for being able to stay in bed = lucky, me choosing to go down the route of doing an MA that I despise = pathetic, you having a great big paycheck at the end of the week/month = lucky, you having to get out of bed when there are so many useless spongers of society never working a day of their lives = pathetic. However, now now, we wouldn't want a domino effect to occur would we? Heaven forbid!

After turning on my laptop and television - the first things I do every morning, I proceeded to surf the Internet looking for some interesting beings to converse with, unfortunately all the people I wanted to talk to were offline - I hate when that happens! Therefore I decided to try and get some white tack that had melted into my walls off. If I can give you one piece of advice for your lives it would be - DO NOT USE WHITE TACK! White tack is the Lindsay Lohan of all the tacks - cheap, useless, doesn't do it's job and most important of all tacky! This process took me almost two hours, after which I was too fucked off to do anything constructive with my day.

I turned my attention to finishing off a letter for a girl in Scotland, my first reply to her so I wanted to make it someway special. First impressions count for everything right? Sad but true, especially in the form of a snail mail letter. However, it is not just about the aesthetic value of things right? Yeah, yeah lets not kid ourselves here people! Snail mail consumes a little bit of my day each day and I think it's nice that I have a bit of antiquity to look forward to each day. Keeps me humble!

I then proceeded to get myself ready and drive to the city to pay my car insurance, a bill which seems to be paid every bloody week, why the bank can't do it's job and let them take the instalments is beyond me...oh wait, the banks couldn't do their job properly in the first place, hence the entire globe being in recession bar China, thanks a bunch fuck faces... The city was so crowded, I hate that and I heard my first Christmas song yesterday, I hate that even more. If you hadn't guessed already I don't like a lot of things...or people! So if I appear to like you you're very special. 1...2...3...awhhhhhhh!

The rest of my day was embroiled in watching Family Guy - why is Season Nine such a let down by the way? Reading magazines which I just HAD to buy even though I am poor and eating lollipops, yes I am 5...The real highlight of my day was when I came home. You know when there is this one person who has your attention because of something they do/have done which makes you feel happy, well this person came online. Praise Jesus, otherwise my night would have been filled with mundane comments of "Hey how are you!" and the most drab updates on Facebook, God I hate Facebook, but still use it. Walking contradiction much Fifi!? Anyway this person, I'm not saying much...these types of people have a way of disappearing, they should become magicians! They seem just too good to be true...

Things I learnt today... the 'I' before 'E' except after 'C' rule hardly ever works. Case in point, the words 'weird' and 'vein'.

As a creative way to destroy boredom and to use my creativity in a positive way I have decided to try and right a book. This has always been a lifelong dream of mine and hopefully one that can materialise over time. I shall keep you updated on how it's going and I think I may actually go and start it now so...

So, I shall end on some thoughtful and somewhat philosophical questions -

Can you miss something you've never had?

Can you like someone you've never met?

Will there always be something/someone better than you?

Slán leat agus thank you for reading.

Annoyingness

2010-05-02T04:16:00.000-07:00

Recently I have become aware of some of the most annoying things on this world ever. These are things which really annoy me, if you agree please comment, if you have anymore suggestions please comment them too. I realise that this is a post about complaining but really I see it as a chance to vent and a chance for us to realise what is wrong and how to change it, okay with me now? Great. Enjoy and I hope some of these make you laugh as well as make you cringe!

1. Pop-up ads on the Internet
I honestly don't know who clicks on these things. STOP and perhaps they will disappear forever! No I don't want to buy some Kellogg's cereals, I am TRYING to use MSN!

2. MSN Video Calls/Mic Issues
On the topic of MSN, why bother having a video call system if you can't feckin video call!? Also why doesn't my mic work properly and no my camera is not in use considering my video call isn't working you piece of total worthlessness!

3. Incorrect spelling/grammar in rap songs
I don't care who you are or where you are from "The way I is" is wrong, you sound like a tool!

4. White people acting like they are black
So you come from Cork city not the Bronx, take off all that hilarious gold jewelry, you are NOT 'gansta' and stop talking like "Yo dog, this is the way I is aiiggghhtt" and no...it's not because you are black it's cause you are white you tool! Funny only for Ali G not for you! And any who I am sure the majority of black people would be offended by your awful representation of them.

5. TV commercials
Oh my God go away, this is most prominent on Sky, I want to watch the programme not listen to garbage

6. TV ads for gold converters/injury claims
Go away, gold jewelry disappeared during the 1990's, it's all about silver don't you know and no I didn't have an accident that wasn't my fault, feck off!

7. When there is nothing on the TV but sport
Most prominent on a Saturday. I don't like sport, not everyone likes sport, put on something worth watching, I am paying for a TV license you know!

8. Bad drivers
You annoy me so much, die!

9. Poor spelling
It's 2010 people! Use your damn spellchecker!

10. People who pretend to be more drunk than they are
Please grow up and no I am not looking after you all night, if so tell your mam to give me 20 quid for the babysitting fee!

11. People who wear sunglasses indoors
Eh...I wasn't aware that the sun could travel through roofs, take off the sunglasses you damn fool.

12. Radio presenters
You are NOT funny, I don't care what you have to say play some bloody music already!

13. MySpace
Enough said.

14. Rude people
Okay so it's bad manners to point out bad manners apparently but are the words "Please" and "Thank you" beyond your vocabulary?

15. Emos
God please grow up and stop drawing tears made of eyeliner on your face, if you want to cry then cry!

16. Skanks
Put some clothes on, not everyone wants to see your underwear. Enough said.

17. People who are famous for doing nothing
Case in point Paris Hilton, Jade Goody, etc.

18. People who say arts is an easy course
No it's not, you try writing an 8,000 word essay on Medieval Irish history fucker!

19. Scumbags
Please go back to the hole you came out of and die

20. People who walk slow on a main shopping street
Stop perusing and get out of my way, my money is burning a hole in my pocket moron!

21. Manga/animae
Never was cool and never will be

22. People working in an English speaking country that can't speak English
You work in a deli, I asked you for a chicken sandwich, if you don't know what that is please go back home.

23. Broken zips/rips on clothes you just bought
I will kill you clothes makers

24. The crowds that are always in Penneys
There are other shops you know!

25. People who think they have right of way on a street just because they are pushing a pram
Eh, no you don't. I will knock you down.

26. People who walk out in front of your car when you are driving
Please go commit suicide in front of someone else's car, I have somewhere to be.

27. Irish celebrities
You are not celebrities

28. Fat people who complain about being fat
Put down the chocolate cake retard

29. The price of things
Why is Ireland so expensive, I don't know! Do you?

30. Potholes
Will someone please fix them I can't afford new tyres.

31. Wind
Thank you for raping my hair

32. People who think they are better than you.
Eh, no your not.

33. Airplane flights always being delayed
Why!? What is the bloody problem, I can see the plane, lets go!

34. Heavy traffic
Where the hell is everyone going and why do they have to be going my way?

35. Getting caught behind a slow moving vehicle whilst driving
Why are tractors so bloody so?

36. Some people's status updates on Facebook
Who really cares?

I hope you enjoyed this little rant from me.

Sweet Charity

2010-04-22T14:06:00.000-07:00

^^Stunning pictures shot by Lee at Absolute Studios Dublin

I want to write about something which everyone should have a little bit of in their lives - it's called charity. Now I know that most of us bypass the collection box at tills in shops, ignore the charity collector outside a shop and then get increasingly frustrated when we see throngs of charity people dotted around the city wanting our money while we are just trying to do our shopping! This does not mean we are scrooges by any means just mere human beings is all. I'm quite aware that we can't help every charity, that would be insane, then it would be us left looking for the charity! However, I do believe that a person is capable of helping at least one charity a month and this month I vow that you try to help the Marie Keating Foundation.

This post has come about from yet another social networking website, this time Facebook - yes everyone uses this, hurray! But in all seriousness I was delighted to be approached by a lovely woman called Yasmine who saw me promoting my blog on various peoples Facebook pages and she asked me would I be interested in writing a piece to promote the Beauty in Pink event. I jumped at the chance!

The Marie Keating Foundation is a cancer charity, something which I and I'm sure most of you have had experiences with in your family. The charity was founded by members of the Keating family who lost their mother Marie to breast cancer in 1998. The family vow to do everything they can to bring an end to breast cancer, however they also help people with other forms of cancer. The charity helps to make cancer less frightening by enlightening. Like most charities the charity is funded by donations and receives no assistance from the government. This is why it is so vitally important that if you can spare an hour of your day to attend MakeypFabLicious' Beauty in Pink event at their makeup academy on Dame Street, Dublin 2. MakeupFabLicious is one of the most prestigious makeup colleges in Ireland, one which you can attend for a measly 2 Euro on May 22nd and 29th. This is one truly for the girls! I personally think this is a fabulous idea using makeup as a means of fundraising for charity - ingenious!

The academy will be holding makeup classes in skin care, application, eye makeup etc, all classes will be given by professional makeup artists. The fee for this delightful experience, just 2 Euro for one class, 10 Euro for the day - you would absolutely be crazy not to go and support the Marie Keating Foundation for that price! So get your pink on and strut on down to the makeup academy to help support a charity and to make yourself feel and look much better!

The time table for the day is as so:

10.00 - Skin and cleansing
11.00 - Makeup basics: primer/foundation and flawless makeup
11.30 to 12.30 - Simple hairstyling techniques
14.00 - Cult products and new trends for the season
14.30 - Day looks
15.30 to 16.30 - Smokey eyes and evening looks

So pick which classes, if not all, you want to go to and go along!

Now I hear you ask - "Since you are urging me to go, will you be attending yourself?" The answer is regretfully not. The event is on in Dublin and I live in Cork, therefore I won't be able to make it. But I hope that if I can get enough Dubliners to read this and go then this will be redeemed! I do propose that a similar event takes place in Cork and other areas of Ireland to further support the Marie Keating Foundation and make the rest of us Irish girls dab hands at makeup applying too!

All funds from the day will go directly to the Marie Keating Foundation to help it continue it's fabulous work in cancer support. Please go along, have fun, learn a skill and help to support a truly worthwhile charity. If I have encouraged at least on of my readers to go then I will be happy as all proceeds are greatly needed and appreciated by the Marie Keating Foundation.

The event is sponsored by Inglot, Liffey Valley.

For more information on the event or to book your place contact the MakeupFablicious Academy, 36 Dame Street, Dublin 2.

Telephone: 0818 33 21 21

Email: info@makeupfablicious.com

Website: www.makeupfablicious.com

Snap Happy

2010-04-21T15:33:00.001-07:00

I have begun taking a new direction on my posts and right now I want to showcase talented people from all genres. I have recently started thinking that it would be great to showcase talent from here in Ireland and I thought what better way to start than with the lovely and exceptionally talented photographer Miss Lili Forberg, with her permission of course, which she was quite happy to give.

I first heard of Lili years ago, once again from browsing on Bebo - really people it is an amazing site, get back onto it NOW! I had seen how popular Lili was and how desperate young girls and established models were to have their portfolios and pictures taken by Lili. I found it astonishing at the time how much exposure this photographer was getting on a social networking site but by taking one glance at her work it is perfectly clear to see why.

Lili has shot everyone from musicians such as MGMT, fashion models such as Caprice and countless celebrities and it seems that Lili has become a somewhat celebrity herself with her name being widely know throughout the Irish fashion and showbiz circuit. Lili's work has appeared in countless publications such as the Sunday World Magazine, Stellar, U and Tatler to name a few, quite a feat for a young photographer. As well as being an established showbiz photographer Lili also has many commercial clients under her belt such as Adidas, Wrangler and Specsavers, all medallions of her talent no doubt.

Lili's style is ultra glam, her pictures always seem to depict a slice of perfection. The lighting and angles is always specific and clear which really gives the pictures a funky edge. Personally I believe that fashion photography is Lili's fortay, the pictures she has shot in this area are nothing short of stunning.

So I hear you ask, 'why promote someone who is already so established?' I personally believe that it doesn't matter how popular you are, all exposure is good exposure. Also from being connected with Lili on many social networking sites such as Twitter etc it is easy to see how hard the girl works with her many updates throughout the day. Why not award hard workers with obvious talent. Lili deserves her success and I am happy to say that she is also a lovely and charming person, success has not gone to her head!

Unfortunately as a writer it saddens me to say that my words will never be able to express Lili's talent as well as her pictures so take a look see and judge for yourself at these virtual locations! I can guarantee you will be queuing up to be photographed by her just like everyone else in Ireland!

The photo's displayed above are personal favourites of mine by Lili.

www.misslili.net - Lili's main website

info@misslili.net

http://www.twitter.com/liliforberg - Lili's Twitter http://www.facebook.com/pages/Lili-Forberg-Photography/388792525311 - Lili's Facebook http://missliliphoto.wordpress.com/ - Lili's Blog

Talented Young Beings

2010-04-20T16:12:00.000-07:00

I wanted to promote wondrous new talents on my blog space and finally I have found someone worthy of appreciation. Her name is Holly.

Holly is a sweet girl I came across randomly on Bebo - yes Bebo remember that, get using it again people! Any who I saw her promoting her YouTube video channel so I thought I'd give it a look-see and I was absolutely blown away by her talent!

Holly's YouTube channel is nothing short of being quite astounding. From what I gather she writes and sings all her own songs. Oh another singer/songwriter I hear you groan, but really is is amazingly good. Quite a Sinead O' Connor/Florence Welsh-esque style voice in my opinion, which is really riveting to listen to. I was really in awe of Holly's writing ability. The songs are personal and show emotion and mass.

If you don't believe my words of high praise then check out Holly's YouTube channel for yourself www.youtube.com/smoothiesforme She now has 1,000 subscribers and counting, which is great but not good enough. Her song "I'll Make You Mine" will be available on iTunes soon which is a great feat to have at her age, a symbol of her talent no doubt. With her talent she should have a lot more so check her out and subscribe, I can guarantee you will like her music as much as I did.

Personally my favourite song of Holly's is her destined debut sing "I'll Make You Mine". Her voice is amazing on this track and the sound quality is brilliant considering it was recorded in her own home. It is a great acoustic track, the guitar melody highlights the emotion in her voice perfectly.

Also check out Holly at these virtual locations too and support raw young talent!

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/smoothiesforme Facebook: http://www.youtube.com/smoothiesforme

Operation Transformation

2010-04-15T02:16:00.000-07:00

^^Before in the red and after in the black

I have been updated like a new microsoft office! I feel better, I look better and I perform better, in my humble opinion anyway. Hands up if you agree?

I must admit a lot has to be said for a style overhaul. Who would have thought that something as simple as getting a hair cut, new make up and buying new clothes would make someone feel so great?!

As for my goal of scene, I don't think I have achieved it. I'm NOT Internet famous, I certainly don't have a scene boyfriend and I don't look uber crazy yet uber stylish at the same time. So you would say that I have failed in my style overhaul mission but I really and truly believe that that is not the case. I feel fantastic and therefore I have been successful!

Everyone should try a style overhaul once and a while, think of it as a sort of spring clean for the corpse!
I will keep everyone updated on the rest of my scene queen mission.

Damn you Internet I will be famous!

Style Overhall

2010-04-04T02:44:00.000-07:00

^^Scene Queens
I've been thinking over the past few weeks that I want to set myself a challenge, kind of like 'Made' on MTV, only with less effort on my part! So therefore I have settled on a style overhaul. So how would I describe my style then? I would say girly with a slight bit of edge. So I am going to be made into a 'Scene Queen'. In my time of using Bebo I found so many of these scene people. They get so much attention due to their looks and I thought it would be an awesome challenge for a shy girl like me. Just to explain for those not in the know a scene queen is, according to Wiki How ~ "It's a girl who rises above all of the other generic scene kids and becomes a popular socialite". Oh dear God.

Anyway I hear you ask, why the hell would you want to do that and I say for fun! Well, at least I think it will be that is. I like setting myself challenges, I love fashion and I adore my hair so it should be easy peasey right??! I will be following in the lines of Audrey Kitching, Dakota Rose, Rosie Razor and many others. It's a highly competitive scene to be honest ~ see what I did there?!
If anyone is up for the challenge of joining me that would be great, comment here and I'll get back to you. I can here everyone now say "No frickin' way girlie!"

So the steps I must take to reach my goals...
1. Work on my self confidence, I apparently need to learn to be pretty and embrace my flaws...okay check but now, now I'm not to get over confident cause no one likes an arsehole and obviously I'm not supposed to be mean to anyone...anyone?!

2. Get a MySpace page...check, and constantly update on your life to keep people interested ~ I live a very uninteresting life so these should be fun! Blog daily, be active, take pictures, etc. Accept any friend request I get ~ but what if they're a raving psycho pervert? Oh well...

3.Think of a good MySpace name...mines PheePhee Naughton so that's good enough for me. I will need a new name though so any suggestions greatly appreciated people!

4.Find a way to be e-famous. Oh jeez this will be a hard one. I must find something I'm good at, I think photography on this one. So sorry people you will be seeing my photos EVERYWHERE!

5.Learn to use scene lingo, but don't overdo it. Okay, then, apparently this is all about using words from the 70's, I was only born in 1990 so this will also be hard, yeah baby!

6.Get a professional to take pictures of me. Okay so this might be a bit easier for me cause I have contacts in this area, finally something easy!

7.Wear lots of make up. DONE!

8.Get a scene haircut. This one I'll be doing in a minute. It better be fabulous! Don't you hate when you get a haircut and you don't look any different? Yeah I don't think that this will be one of these times...

9.Start a new trend. How about the 'normal' girl look? Anyone go for that? No...oh well everyone loves a trier.

10. Get the accessories. Done already.

11.Be very social. This will be hard, considering I prefer staying in to going out and have a small group of friends. But a challenge is a challenge so it must be done.

12.Get a scene king. Don't think my Barry will go for that to be quite honest. So I think I'll have to pass on this one.

^^ So there you have it, my twelve commandments of sceneness if you will. I think this will be fun and maybe next month I can overhaul my style into something else...barbie girl maybe?!

All support and ideas greatly appreciated people so check out my links and get me to scene queen status!

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/profile.php?ref=profile&id=615300277 ~ my Facebook

http://www.myspace.com/498342358 ~ my MySpace

http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=484752600 ~ my Bebo

http://www.interpals.net/trixiebellexx ~ my Interpals

Thank You!

60's Girls and Boys

2010-04-03T04:31:00.000-07:00

Love NOT War

So as of late I have become increasingly frustrated about the ways of the world today. The rat race lifestyle is not for me and for what I've seen on many peoples profiles on various Internet sites it's not for them either, so I'm proposing that we take a stand against 21st century boredom, rules and structure and regress to the 1960's.

The Swinging Sixties, an era of social revolution, excess, flamboyance and liberty in more ways than one. It was the turning point in politics, with governments taking a more left-wing stance to make things fairer for their people, thirty-two countries in Africa gained independence from their European colonisers, racial segregation was outlawed and generally the world was a more liberalised place.

Of course the 60's had it's fair share of war, the most prominent being the Vietnam War but generally the goal for most people was peace! The 60's were an era of change, Martin Luther King Jr had a dream, Harold Macmillan felt the 'Wind of Change' and Che Guevara was campaigning for a worldwide revolution.

During the 1960's there was a liberty on recreational drug use, something which is so restricted today. How can it be that something which grows from the earth is made illegal? Cannabis should be legalised! It should be an individuals discretion which denotes if they smoke weed or not. The music and fashion of the 1960's was new and exciting, it gave the era an atmosphere of passion and liberation to people of all races, men and women.

It seems that the 1960's had so much that this new age of the 'naughties' does not. It had passion, liberty, discovery and change, there was no mundane lifestyle, it seems that us as a world have been burned out. What else is there to discover, to create? Has it all been done already? Perhaps not, but I believe we should go back in time and learn from the 60's and have fun while doing so.

Lets all become hippies, live on a beach and have the time of our lives! To quote a guy called Lex Muller, I want to ~ "buy a house on a beach clifftop and create the best darn surfing school there ever has been in existence. And never sleep again. Due to the numerous bonfires and bands and dancing and fountain pushing that will be occurring".

^^ He has a dream, Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream and I have a dream for change. So who's with me? Hippie beach life here we come!

Peace && Love

Music For the Jilted Generation

2010-04-03T03:18:00.000-07:00

^^Okay so I took inspiration from the wonderful The Prodigy for my heading but my God I am so sick of shit music being popularised in this day and age! I am all for people being able to express themselves creatively but some people need to know when to stop, case in point Madonna, Whitney Houston, Boyzone, so on and so forth. Personally, I believe that we should look to the bands of the past for inspiration. Gone are the days when getting a record was a treasured thing and here are the days when you can just download an MP3 for nothing ~ it has ruined the whole ambiance of music listening for me. Kudos to bands such as Radiohead who still release their albums on records for treasured listening and, although they also release their albums on MP3 also, they do so FOR FREE! Simply doing it for the sake of music as you wish! I think we should look back to the times of good cult bands - The Sex Pistols, Joy Division, The Beatles and even Metallica (back in the day that is!) who had a huge following of fans of all ages. The atmosphere at their gigs was electric, something utterly cool. We need to eradicate the Disney Generation, get rid of the Justin Biebers, Miley Cyrus' and Jonas Brothers and save music from being exploited! Also another thing that gets my goat, computer games where you learn to play a musical instrument but you have never played that musical instrument in your life! Now I know these are all good fun but we don't need 'Guitar Hero', learn to play the guitar! We don't need 'DJ Hero', buy some decks! We don't need 'Rock Band', we'll form a real one thanks! We need to bring music back to its former glory! So who is with me for saving music for the jilted generation? Everyone you say, well I'll be damned!

Vintage Communications

2010-04-03T02:35:00.000-07:00

^^Things I have received from pen pals!

Two words ~ pen palling!
It is the most vintage form of communication between people,nations, continents, but today there appears to be a revival in the art of writing and letter sending as a mode of communication. It would seem that the current jilted generation x is taking a step back from high-tech modes of communication and regressing into a time when receiving a letter in the post was a treasured thing.

In the last year I joined a website, www.interpals.com ( a site which I highly recommend to anyone) and I can gladly say it was one of the best things I have ever done. I have met so many fabulous people from all over the world! The effort that these people put into their letters is astonishing and it is nothing but remarkable that so many people have joined interpals to get a pen pal ~ the site has 631274 active members and counting! Okay so I admit that it is quite ironic that we had to contact each other first on the Internet to become pen pals but hey, we all have to start somewhere! However, I still find it astonishing that so many people are into pen palling.

Now I have somewhere in the region of twenty-five pen pals, yes twenty-five and each one of them is a new friend. So people get your pen pal on, I can guarantee that it will be one of the most rewarding experiences of your life!

Special thanks to my pen pals: Ashlee, Corina, Jamie, Heather, Mady, Ewa, Erja, Lyndsi, Melissa, Mikala, Camilla, Mikaila, Kyela, Akecia, Sabine, Kelsey, Julia, Marcissa, Ines, Emmi, Peta, Mia, Kristie, Yana and Stephanie ~ you rock my socks! =)